| [Head banger] Sunday, December 14, 2008 11:26:32 AM | |
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the birth of trust???
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by MG_Metalgoddess from Sunday, December 14, 2008 11:20:13 AM)| |  | MG_Metalgoddess wrote: | | LOL @ HB... more for me.... so much for the humanity part... LMAO you crack me up 
| | | Head banger wrote: | | trust can be born from an extension of cooperation, no? we could cooperate to take down a deer to get food, knowing that if we realy tried, one of us could toss the other off the cliff to die, becoming food also.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | OK then my friends, let us undertake a discussion of trust!
We first look at the definition of the word trust, which is reliance on strength, ability or truth of someone or something. Trust would seem to be more of a social construct in that involves two or more people. A hermit living in a cave has no need for trusting another. Still, he may need the same skills for developing a sense of trust, such as trusting in nature and whatnot, but this trust is basically one sided and does not offer reciprocity.
In modern culture, it is often said that trust, like respect, is earned. Trust and cooperation seem to go hand in hand. Afterall, what reason is there for trust without cooperation? Again, a familiar social construct. In this context, trust may be considered a "faith" in the consistency of another. Most often, this is coupled with what one expects as a benefit from this faith. (What is in it for me) The capacity to trust is, therefore, socialized behavior below that of direct thought since we tend to be very selfish creatures by nature. Only when trust is betrayed does the cognitive brain begin to identify the conflict and seeks to re-evaluate the situation. Once identified, the "victim" can choose to "turn the other cheek", as it were, or discontinue the cooperative behavior. The response can also be punitive; that is to say that there is a sense of need for retribution. Quite often this leads to a cycle of response and counter-response. Betrayal breaks the patterns of recognized cooperation in which trust is vested. We often see the "victim" choose a course of "heightened awareness" or being "on guard"
The ability to trust comes from the desire to build relationships with others. By seeking out friendships and cooperative social condition, people learn what to expect from others and thusly, learn who can be "trusted" and who cannot. The ability to forgive will often play a large part in how a person responds to betrayal and the defense mechanism he or she possesses. Trust, like respect,is clearly earned and in some cases it is lost and re-gained through effort and contrition. |
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| [Head banger] Sunday, December 14, 2008 11:22:53 AM | |
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BWAHAHAHAHA
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by guidogodoy from Sunday, December 14, 2008 10:50:19 AM)| | | guidogodoy wrote: | | Were I in close proximity to you, I'd advocate for taking up a collection in order to give you a free gift for having taken the time to share your wise wisdom.
The enormity of that free gift would be enormous.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Good Morning, Boys and Girls! At last we have arrived at another episode of Insomniac Theater. A cool 4:30 in the morning here in blustery Vegas as we begin this installment. Having had more than an hour to ponder our subject matter, I thought we would lean in the direction of good writing! Ah! Good to see so many of you are excited! Let's begin:
We are often faced with the dilemma of what word to use when we are trying to impart a specific image to our reader. This Board is filled with those that choose words which, in this humble educator's opinion, are a bit shall we say...over the top? Unfortunately, I am one of those that has used improper or "over the top" words in an effort to make a point. There is also the profane word or ten that seem to be the everlasting crutch for some. If we are here on this Board, it is important to remember we are writing. We are using printed words. All too often, we forget that words have auras. They have penumbrae or emanations that the good writer should respect. The word "enormity" is a great example.
Enormity is one of those words that carries excess baggage. We are dealing with something that is outrageous, horrifying and grossly evil. You see, words come in weights much like boxers do. They are like sweaters; small, medium, large, extra large and gigantic. The good writer knows that a word like enormity should be left in the file cabinet until we come across a genocide or something.
Next case; redundancy. Ah yes, that habit we all seem to share around here! Again, I am guilty of it and would first like to confess. One particularly offensive example is "advocate for". We say, " Many of us advocate for the rights of our members.." AARRRRGGGHH!! We may campaign for, argue for, beg for and plead for but advocacy takes a direct object! It needs no supplementary preposition.
Well, this concludes our episode for now. I do hope you have all enjoyed it and will be prepared for our quiz later. |
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| [~ MG_Metalgoddess~] Sunday, December 14, 2008 11:20:13 AM | |
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LOL @ HB... more for me.... so much for the humanity part... LMAO you crack me up
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Head banger from Sunday, December 14, 2008 11:17:43 AM)| | | Head banger wrote: | | trust can be born from an extension of cooperation, no? we could cooperate to take down a deer to get food, knowing that if we realy tried, one of us could toss the other off the cliff to die, becoming food also.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | OK then my friends, let us undertake a discussion of trust!
We first look at the definition of the word trust, which is reliance on strength, ability or truth of someone or something. Trust would seem to be more of a social construct in that involves two or more people. A hermit living in a cave has no need for trusting another. Still, he may need the same skills for developing a sense of trust, such as trusting in nature and whatnot, but this trust is basically one sided and does not offer reciprocity.
In modern culture, it is often said that trust, like respect, is earned. Trust and cooperation seem to go hand in hand. Afterall, what reason is there for trust without cooperation? Again, a familiar social construct. In this context, trust may be considered a "faith" in the consistency of another. Most often, this is coupled with what one expects as a benefit from this faith. (What is in it for me) The capacity to trust is, therefore, socialized behavior below that of direct thought since we tend to be very selfish creatures by nature. Only when trust is betrayed does the cognitive brain begin to identify the conflict and seeks to re-evaluate the situation. Once identified, the "victim" can choose to "turn the other cheek", as it were, or discontinue the cooperative behavior. The response can also be punitive; that is to say that there is a sense of need for retribution. Quite often this leads to a cycle of response and counter-response. Betrayal breaks the patterns of recognized cooperation in which trust is vested. We often see the "victim" choose a course of "heightened awareness" or being "on guard"
The ability to trust comes from the desire to build relationships with others. By seeking out friendships and cooperative social condition, people learn what to expect from others and thusly, learn who can be "trusted" and who cannot. The ability to forgive will often play a large part in how a person responds to betrayal and the defense mechanism he or she possesses. Trust, like respect,is clearly earned and in some cases it is lost and re-gained through effort and contrition. |
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| [Head banger] Sunday, December 14, 2008 11:19:30 AM | |
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I do think that the faceless internet society lends itself well to the use of over the top words, phrases, or ideas.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Sunday, December 14, 2008 6:53:05 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Good Morning, Boys and Girls! At last we have arrived at another episode of Insomniac Theater. A cool 4:30 in the morning here in blustery Vegas as we begin this installment. Having had more than an hour to ponder our subject matter, I thought we would lean in the direction of good writing! Ah! Good to see so many of you are excited! Let's begin:
We are often faced with the dilemma of what word to use when we are trying to impart a specific image to our reader. This Board is filled with those that choose words which, in this humble educator's opinion, are a bit shall we say...over the top? Unfortunately, I am one of those that has used improper or "over the top" words in an effort to make a point. There is also the profane word or ten that seem to be the everlasting crutch for some. If we are here on this Board, it is important to remember we are writing. We are using printed words. All too often, we forget that words have auras. They have penumbrae or emanations that the good writer should respect. The word "enormity" is a great example.
Enormity is one of those words that carries excess baggage. We are dealing with something that is outrageous, horrifying and grossly evil. You see, words come in weights much like boxers do. They are like sweaters; small, medium, large, extra large and gigantic. The good writer knows that a word like enormity should be left in the file cabinet until we come across a genocide or something.
Next case; redundancy. Ah yes, that habit we all seem to share around here! Again, I am guilty of it and would first like to confess. One particularly offensive example is "advocate for". We say, " Many of us advocate for the rights of our members.." AARRRRGGGHH!! We may campaign for, argue for, beg for and plead for but advocacy takes a direct object! It needs no supplementary preposition.
Well, this concludes our episode for now. I do hope you have all enjoyed it and will be prepared for our quiz later. |
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| [Head banger] Sunday, December 14, 2008 11:17:43 AM | |
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trust can be born from an extension of cooperation, no? we could cooperate to take down a deer to get food, knowing that if we realy tried, one of us could toss the other off the cliff to die, becoming food also.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:23:09 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | OK then my friends, let us undertake a discussion of trust!
We first look at the definition of the word trust, which is reliance on strength, ability or truth of someone or something. Trust would seem to be more of a social construct in that involves two or more people. A hermit living in a cave has no need for trusting another. Still, he may need the same skills for developing a sense of trust, such as trusting in nature and whatnot, but this trust is basically one sided and does not offer reciprocity.
In modern culture, it is often said that trust, like respect, is earned. Trust and cooperation seem to go hand in hand. Afterall, what reason is there for trust without cooperation? Again, a familiar social construct. In this context, trust may be considered a "faith" in the consistency of another. Most often, this is coupled with what one expects as a benefit from this faith. (What is in it for me) The capacity to trust is, therefore, socialized behavior below that of direct thought since we tend to be very selfish creatures by nature. Only when trust is betrayed does the cognitive brain begin to identify the conflict and seeks to re-evaluate the situation. Once identified, the "victim" can choose to "turn the other cheek", as it were, or discontinue the cooperative behavior. The response can also be punitive; that is to say that there is a sense of need for retribution. Quite often this leads to a cycle of response and counter-response. Betrayal breaks the patterns of recognized cooperation in which trust is vested. We often see the "victim" choose a course of "heightened awareness" or being "on guard"
The ability to trust comes from the desire to build relationships with others. By seeking out friendships and cooperative social condition, people learn what to expect from others and thusly, learn who can be "trusted" and who cannot. The ability to forgive will often play a large part in how a person responds to betrayal and the defense mechanism he or she possesses. Trust, like respect,is clearly earned and in some cases it is lost and re-gained through effort and contrition. |
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| [Head banger] Sunday, December 14, 2008 10:59:59 AM | |
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Respect can be broken, but depending on the solidity of the respect, one infraction will not break it. I supose it dependeds on the level of respect. Say an unkind word about your spouse of 20 years once, it can be forgiven and moved on from. Break the trust of that spouse, you may never recover.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by ronhartsell from Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:15:59 AM)| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [guidogodoy] Sunday, December 14, 2008 10:50:19 AM | |
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Were I in close proximity to you, I'd advocate for taking up a collection in order to give you a free gift for having taken the time to share your wise wisdom.
The enormity of that free gift would be enormous.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Sunday, December 14, 2008 6:53:05 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Good Morning, Boys and Girls! At last we have arrived at another episode of Insomniac Theater. A cool 4:30 in the morning here in blustery Vegas as we begin this installment. Having had more than an hour to ponder our subject matter, I thought we would lean in the direction of good writing! Ah! Good to see so many of you are excited! Let's begin:
We are often faced with the dilemma of what word to use when we are trying to impart a specific image to our reader. This Board is filled with those that choose words which, in this humble educator's opinion, are a bit shall we say...over the top? Unfortunately, I am one of those that has used improper or "over the top" words in an effort to make a point. There is also the profane word or ten that seem to be the everlasting crutch for some. If we are here on this Board, it is important to remember we are writing. We are using printed words. All too often, we forget that words have auras. They have penumbrae or emanations that the good writer should respect. The word "enormity" is a great example.
Enormity is one of those words that carries excess baggage. We are dealing with something that is outrageous, horrifying and grossly evil. You see, words come in weights much like boxers do. They are like sweaters; small, medium, large, extra large and gigantic. The good writer knows that a word like enormity should be left in the file cabinet until we come across a genocide or something.
Next case; redundancy. Ah yes, that habit we all seem to share around here! Again, I am guilty of it and would first like to confess. One particularly offensive example is "advocate for". We say, " Many of us advocate for the rights of our members.." AARRRRGGGHH!! We may campaign for, argue for, beg for and plead for but advocacy takes a direct object! It needs no supplementary preposition.
Well, this concludes our episode for now. I do hope you have all enjoyed it and will be prepared for our quiz later. |
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| [Deep Freeze] Sunday, December 14, 2008 9:00:13 AM | |
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You too, my friend. Good Day.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by ronhartsell from Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:59:09 AM)| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | | Well DF, I really enjoyed chatting with you this morning. I must take leave now as I have things to do before football comes on. I will be sure to re-visit this later. Until then, stay warm and enjoy the games!! |
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| [ron h] Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:59:09 AM | |
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| Well DF, I really enjoyed chatting with you this morning. I must take leave now as I have things to do before football comes on. I will be sure to re-visit this later. Until then, stay warm and enjoy the games!! |
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| [Deep Freeze] Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:52:13 AM | |
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Quite so. I suppose there are levels of trust just as respect. We trust our banks with our money. We trust our cars with our mechanics. Of course, it is a different level of trust.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by ronhartsell from Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:48:19 AM)| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Very well put. I would also like to suggest that TRUST is one of the more intimate feelings that we have. I believe that trust is resrved for those closest to us, in most cases for those that you know have your best interests at heart at all times. Unlike respect, which you either do or don't have in a particular case, trust is something that we humans sometimes even wish or hope for in another. I would say that some of us even put a higher value in trust than in love.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | OK then my friends, let us undertake a discussion of trust!
We first look at the definition of the word trust, which is reliance on strength, ability or truth of someone or something. Trust would seem to be more of a social construct in that involves two or more people. A hermit living in a cave has no need for trusting another. Still, he may need the same skills for developing a sense of trust, such as trusting in nature and whatnot, but this trust is basically one sided and does not offer reciprocity.
In modern culture, it is often said that trust, like respect, is earned. Trust and cooperation seem to go hand in hand. Afterall, what reason is there for trust without cooperation? Again, a familiar social construct. In this context, trust may be considered a "faith" in the consistency of another. Most often, this is coupled with what one expects as a benefit from this faith. (What is in it for me) The capacity to trust is, therefore, socialized behavior below that of direct thought since we tend to be very selfish creatures by nature. Only when trust is betrayed does the cognitive brain begin to identify the conflict and seeks to re-evaluate the situation. Once identified, the "victim" can choose to "turn the other cheek", as it were, or discontinue the cooperative behavior. The response can also be punitive; that is to say that there is a sense of need for retribution. Quite often this leads to a cycle of response and counter-response. Betrayal breaks the patterns of recognized cooperation in which trust is vested. We often see the "victim" choose a course of "heightened awareness" or being "on guard"
The ability to trust comes from the desire to build relationships with others. By seeking out friendships and cooperative social condition, people learn what to expect from others and thusly, learn who can be "trusted" and who cannot. The ability to forgive will often play a large part in how a person responds to betrayal and the defense mechanism he or she possesses. Trust, like respect,is clearly earned and in some cases it is lost and re-gained through effort and contrition. |
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| [ron h] Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:48:19 AM | |
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Very well put. I would also like to suggest that TRUST is one of the more intimate feelings that we have. I believe that trust is resrved for those closest to us, in most cases for those that you know have your best interests at heart at all times. Unlike respect, which you either do or don't have in a particular case, trust is something that we humans sometimes even wish or hope for in another. I would say that some of us even put a higher value in trust than in love.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:23:09 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | OK then my friends, let us undertake a discussion of trust!
We first look at the definition of the word trust, which is reliance on strength, ability or truth of someone or something. Trust would seem to be more of a social construct in that involves two or more people. A hermit living in a cave has no need for trusting another. Still, he may need the same skills for developing a sense of trust, such as trusting in nature and whatnot, but this trust is basically one sided and does not offer reciprocity.
In modern culture, it is often said that trust, like respect, is earned. Trust and cooperation seem to go hand in hand. Afterall, what reason is there for trust without cooperation? Again, a familiar social construct. In this context, trust may be considered a "faith" in the consistency of another. Most often, this is coupled with what one expects as a benefit from this faith. (What is in it for me) The capacity to trust is, therefore, socialized behavior below that of direct thought since we tend to be very selfish creatures by nature. Only when trust is betrayed does the cognitive brain begin to identify the conflict and seeks to re-evaluate the situation. Once identified, the "victim" can choose to "turn the other cheek", as it were, or discontinue the cooperative behavior. The response can also be punitive; that is to say that there is a sense of need for retribution. Quite often this leads to a cycle of response and counter-response. Betrayal breaks the patterns of recognized cooperation in which trust is vested. We often see the "victim" choose a course of "heightened awareness" or being "on guard"
The ability to trust comes from the desire to build relationships with others. By seeking out friendships and cooperative social condition, people learn what to expect from others and thusly, learn who can be "trusted" and who cannot. The ability to forgive will often play a large part in how a person responds to betrayal and the defense mechanism he or she possesses. Trust, like respect,is clearly earned and in some cases it is lost and re-gained through effort and contrition. |
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| [Deep Freeze] Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:23:09 AM | |
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OK then my friends, let us undertake a discussion of trust!
We first look at the definition of the word trust, which is reliance on strength, ability or truth of someone or something. Trust would seem to be more of a social construct in that involves two or more people. A hermit living in a cave has no need for trusting another. Still, he may need the same skills for developing a sense of trust, such as trusting in nature and whatnot, but this trust is basically one sided and does not offer reciprocity.
In modern culture, it is often said that trust, like respect, is earned. Trust and cooperation seem to go hand in hand. Afterall, what reason is there for trust without cooperation? Again, a familiar social construct. In this context, trust may be considered a "faith" in the consistency of another. Most often, this is coupled with what one expects as a benefit from this faith. (What is in it for me) The capacity to trust is, therefore, socialized behavior below that of direct thought since we tend to be very selfish creatures by nature. Only when trust is betrayed does the cognitive brain begin to identify the conflict and seeks to re-evaluate the situation. Once identified, the "victim" can choose to "turn the other cheek", as it were, or discontinue the cooperative behavior. The response can also be punitive; that is to say that there is a sense of need for retribution. Quite often this leads to a cycle of response and counter-response. Betrayal breaks the patterns of recognized cooperation in which trust is vested. We often see the "victim" choose a course of "heightened awareness" or being "on guard"
The ability to trust comes from the desire to build relationships with others. By seeking out friendships and cooperative social condition, people learn what to expect from others and thusly, learn who can be "trusted" and who cannot. The ability to forgive will often play a large part in how a person responds to betrayal and the defense mechanism he or she possesses. Trust, like respect,is clearly earned and in some cases it is lost and re-gained through effort and contrition. |
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| [ron h] Sunday, December 14, 2008 8:03:08 AM | |
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One of the reasons I ask is that the way a person feels after they have given respect and/or have put trust in someone and said respect/trust has been violated, the feelings are the same either way. Both are disheartening in the end, and in some instances life altering.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:53:43 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | HA! I agree!! I am certainly impressed with your thirst for knowledge, my friend!! STRAT!! You see this?? HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAA!!!!!!!!
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | How about TRUST? I think that would be an interesting lesson. I would like to consider your take on the subject. Is a person who earns respect automatically TRUSTWORTHY? In reality I believe that those are two very different and exclusive groups. In a lot of ways they are alike, yet they are so very different.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | I would certainly agree that there are different types or levels of respect.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Would you agree that there are different 'types' of respect? I may respect ones' ability to gain wealth, but I may not respect the way one goes about obtaing said wealth. Or do you think that to respect a person means to respect 'all' that the person represents?
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Hmm..I have never really considered it that way Ron. I suppose it could be considered fragile but I would think that a person who has earned respect did so in such a way as to build a foundation that is solid. What I mean is, one slip-up here or there should not affect that person's standing with those that actually do respect him. Perhaps it is self-perception that is at stake? Not that one cannot lose repsect, because that can happen, but I think if one is truly a dignified and respectable person, he would be allowed the occasional mistake.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [Deep Freeze] Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:53:43 AM | |
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HA! I agree!! I am certainly impressed with your thirst for knowledge, my friend!! STRAT!! You see this?? HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAA!!!!!!!!
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by ronhartsell from Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:51:36 AM)| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | How about TRUST? I think that would be an interesting lesson. I would like to consider your take on the subject. Is a person who earns respect automatically TRUSTWORTHY? In reality I believe that those are two very different and exclusive groups. In a lot of ways they are alike, yet they are so very different.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | I would certainly agree that there are different types or levels of respect.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Would you agree that there are different 'types' of respect? I may respect ones' ability to gain wealth, but I may not respect the way one goes about obtaing said wealth. Or do you think that to respect a person means to respect 'all' that the person represents?
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Hmm..I have never really considered it that way Ron. I suppose it could be considered fragile but I would think that a person who has earned respect did so in such a way as to build a foundation that is solid. What I mean is, one slip-up here or there should not affect that person's standing with those that actually do respect him. Perhaps it is self-perception that is at stake? Not that one cannot lose repsect, because that can happen, but I think if one is truly a dignified and respectable person, he would be allowed the occasional mistake.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [ron h] Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:51:36 AM | |
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How about TRUST? I think that would be an interesting lesson. I would like to consider your take on the subject. Is a person who earns respect automatically TRUSTWORTHY? In reality I believe that those are two very different and exclusive groups. In a lot of ways they are alike, yet they are so very different.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:42:19 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | I would certainly agree that there are different types or levels of respect.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Would you agree that there are different 'types' of respect? I may respect ones' ability to gain wealth, but I may not respect the way one goes about obtaing said wealth. Or do you think that to respect a person means to respect 'all' that the person represents?
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Hmm..I have never really considered it that way Ron. I suppose it could be considered fragile but I would think that a person who has earned respect did so in such a way as to build a foundation that is solid. What I mean is, one slip-up here or there should not affect that person's standing with those that actually do respect him. Perhaps it is self-perception that is at stake? Not that one cannot lose repsect, because that can happen, but I think if one is truly a dignified and respectable person, he would be allowed the occasional mistake.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [Deep Freeze] Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:42:19 AM | |
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I would certainly agree that there are different types or levels of respect.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by ronhartsell from Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:38:34 AM)| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Would you agree that there are different 'types' of respect? I may respect ones' ability to gain wealth, but I may not respect the way one goes about obtaing said wealth. Or do you think that to respect a person means to respect 'all' that the person represents?
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Hmm..I have never really considered it that way Ron. I suppose it could be considered fragile but I would think that a person who has earned respect did so in such a way as to build a foundation that is solid. What I mean is, one slip-up here or there should not affect that person's standing with those that actually do respect him. Perhaps it is self-perception that is at stake? Not that one cannot lose repsect, because that can happen, but I think if one is truly a dignified and respectable person, he would be allowed the occasional mistake.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [ron h] Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:38:34 AM | |
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Would you agree that there are different 'types' of respect? I may respect ones' ability to gain wealth, but I may not respect the way one goes about obtaing said wealth. Or do you think that to respect a person means to respect 'all' that the person represents?
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:25:32 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | Hmm..I have never really considered it that way Ron. I suppose it could be considered fragile but I would think that a person who has earned respect did so in such a way as to build a foundation that is solid. What I mean is, one slip-up here or there should not affect that person's standing with those that actually do respect him. Perhaps it is self-perception that is at stake? Not that one cannot lose repsect, because that can happen, but I think if one is truly a dignified and respectable person, he would be allowed the occasional mistake.
| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [Deep Freeze] Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:25:32 AM | |
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Hmm..I have never really considered it that way Ron. I suppose it could be considered fragile but I would think that a person who has earned respect did so in such a way as to build a foundation that is solid. What I mean is, one slip-up here or there should not affect that person's standing with those that actually do respect him. Perhaps it is self-perception that is at stake? Not that one cannot lose repsect, because that can happen, but I think if one is truly a dignified and respectable person, he would be allowed the occasional mistake.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by ronhartsell from Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:15:59 AM)| | | ronhartsell wrote: | | Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [ron h] Sunday, December 14, 2008 7:15:59 AM | |
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Wow DF, did Princess get rid of the encyclopedia's when she married you (LOL)? I am impressed with the lesson on RESPECT, you managed to hit on pretty much everything one should know about it. It is very true that parents are indeed the first educators of respect. Do you think you can have a 5 min. conversation with a person and get an idea of what kind of parents (guardians) that person had?
I would also suggest that once a person has earned respect, it is vital to maintain that respect. Gaining respect and keeping it can be two different animals. A person can spend their entire life with all the respect in the world, only to make/do one 'thing' to bring it all crashing down. Respect is fragile and it doesn't take a lot to break it.
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Deep Freeze from Thursday, December 04, 2008 6:59:38 AM)| | | Deep Freeze wrote: | | At last! We begin our next edition of Insomniac Theater. As previously requested by one of our classmates, this morning we shall discuss respect. While respect can take on several definitions, it is important that we first try to understand its origins. Imagine, if you will, a group of 'cavepeople' wandering the primordial earth, searching for food and shelter. A member that fell behind most certainly would die. Such a person, having no worth or value to the group, would not be respected and thus, we see that respect is a very primal, psychological need. It almost has an instinctual value about it. Of course, we live in an age where a person might certainly survive without due respect. A person that can play professional sports, for example, or has a lot of money through family may survive and yet not get the respect another may receive.
Although life itself may not depend on respect , there is still value in earning it. Sometimes, very important decisions are made on the basis of respect for another. Sincere respect , then, takes on a completely different value. Conversely, a false-respect can affect a decision towards another and show that lack in other ways.
We all want to be respected. We can sense when we are or are not respected. A person of great wealth usually expects a certain amount of respect, as does one of great power. Perhaps this is why they seek the wealth and power in the first place? For you see, with respect comes a sense of power. There is cooperation from others and , therefore, less of our own resources are expended. There are fewer conflicts. And , of course, we feel better about ourselves when we are shown respect. Evolution and practicality then are clearly reasons respect has importance to us.
As mentioned previously, respect is earned. At least most of the time. By taking into account the needs and feelings of others (respecting), and volunteering to be helpful, one earns their respect. Some people make the mistake that repsect can be demanded or forced but this tends to lead to a "false" respect as it is not sincere. This then begs the question, "how does one learn to respect others"?
I believe respect is a value that is taught from a young age. A baby has no concept of respect. They first learn dependancy. There is a need to teach respect to children so that it is a value with which they live, just as we teach them not to steal, use violence or lie. This teaching is accomplished by showing a child respect. By imparting upon the child the value of respect and the sense of what it means to him. A person with no respect for themself is simply unable to respect another.
We show respect by validating others. By understanding their feelings and being considerate. When we listen unconditionally and do not judge, we validate the speaker and , thereby, gain their respect. It is important that the person know we sincerely care about their feelings. Accomodating another for the sake of their feelings, we begin to earn their respect. In short, by showing respect we earn it in return. Remember, when a person feels repected, they most often tend to reciprocate that respect.
It is also important that we do not confuse respect with fear. A gang member carrying a gun will often complain that he was "disrespected". Since they have no respect for others, they cannot earn respect. Instead, they gain fear. They are feared for what they might do and confuse this with respect. Respect is voluntary, not coerced. Fear is poisonous while respect is nurturing. Fear is forced while respect is earned. Certainly there is an inverse relationship between fear and respect but it is generally understood that we learn to fear. Again, repsect is earned.It is incumbent upon parents to teach the consequences of lacking respect. Likewise, parents must respect their children in order to give that sense of being respected. People that do not feel respected while young tend to take things more personally as adults. They may make a big scene or act out in an overly emotional manner because they have repressed feelings of pain due to lack of respect. There is also a sense of very low self-esteem which causes people to act in an irrational, rude or violent manner as they have not learned to respect others. Additionally, a child that is given everything he wants, or has not been taught to earn things tends to have no respect for the value of work. There is a lack of realization when understanding consequence for action.
It is clearly important that we understand the value of true respect. By demonstrating this value when dealing with others, we will receive it in return. Respect, by and large, is valued above all other things and is sought out by most everyone. It gives us a sense of worth. A sense of ease and certainly one of power.
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:08:59 AM Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:09:45 AM
Edited at: Thursday, December 04, 2008 7:17:09 AM |
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| [Deep Freeze] Sunday, December 14, 2008 6:53:05 AM | |
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Good Morning, Boys and Girls! At last we have arrived at another episode of Insomniac Theater. A cool 4:30 in the morning here in blustery Vegas as we begin this installment. Having had more than an hour to ponder our subject matter, I thought we would lean in the direction of good writing! Ah! Good to see so many of you are excited! Let's begin:
We are often faced with the dilemma of what word to use when we are trying to impart a specific image to our reader. This Board is filled with those that choose words which, in this humble educator's opinion, are a bit shall we say...over the top? Unfortunately, I am one of those that has used improper or "over the top" words in an effort to make a point. There is also the profane word or ten that seem to be the everlasting crutch for some. If we are here on this Board, it is important to remember we are writing. We are using printed words. All too often, we forget that words have auras. They have penumbrae or emanations that the good writer should respect. The word "enormity" is a great example.
Enormity is one of those words that carries excess baggage. We are dealing with something that is outrageous, horrifying and grossly evil. You see, words come in weights much like boxers do. They are like sweaters; small, medium, large, extra large and gigantic. The good writer knows that a word like enormity should be left in the file cabinet until we come across a genocide or something.
Next case; redundancy. Ah yes, that habit we all seem to share around here! Again, I am guilty of it and would first like to confess. One particularly offensive example is "advocate for". We say, " Many of us advocate for the rights of our members.." AARRRRGGGHH!! We may campaign for, argue for, beg for and plead for but advocacy takes a direct object! It needs no supplementary preposition.
Well, this concludes our episode for now. I do hope you have all enjoyed it and will be prepared for our quiz later. |
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