| [Metal god/Electric eye! [Banned]] Wednesday, September 17, 2008 7:49:11 AM | |
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THANKS FOR THE STORM WARNING!  ELECTRIC EYE!
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by lalouve from Wednesday, September 17, 2008 7:34:30 AM)| |  | lalouve wrote: | | choose carefully ... it's foggy today in my part of the world ... 
| | | Metal god/Electric eye! wrote: | | CUM ON LETS FACE IT! 
| | | lalouve wrote: | | What's the difference between a 69 and a winding mountain road in a blizzard ?
------ with the 69 you can at least see the asshole coming up ahead |
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| [lalouve] Wednesday, September 17, 2008 7:34:30 AM | |
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choose carefully ... it's foggy today in my part of the world ...
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Metal god/Electric eye! from Tuesday, September 16, 2008 7:53:15 PM)| | | Metal god/Electric eye! wrote: | | CUM ON LETS FACE IT!
| | | lalouve wrote: | | What's the difference between a 69 and a winding mountain road in a blizzard ?
------ with the 69 you can at least see the asshole coming up ahead |
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| [Metal god/Electric eye! [Banned]] Tuesday, September 16, 2008 7:53:15 PM | |
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CUM ON LETS FACE IT!
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by lalouve from Sunday, September 14, 2008 5:31:38 AM)| | | lalouve wrote: | | What's the difference between a 69 and a winding mountain road in a blizzard ?
------ with the 69 you can at least see the asshole coming up ahead |
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| [jimmyjames] Monday, September 15, 2008 6:54:49 PM | |
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These ones are really bad so don't read em if your easily offended or disgusted.
Whats green and melts in your mouth?
A lepers cock.
Whats a definition of a good time?
Dipping your dick in sugar and walking through a kindergarten.
Whats the difference between jelly and jam?
You can't jelly your dick up your girlfriends ass. |
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| [crypticangle] Monday, September 15, 2008 2:24:06 PM | |
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Good one Jaime !! 
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by jimmyjames from Monday, September 15, 2008 7:47:17 AM)| | | jimmyjames wrote: | | A guy goes into a confessional and says "forgive me father for i have sinned" "confess your sins and all will be forgiven my son" the priest replies. "well father " says the guy "yesterday my wife was bending over to get something out of the freezer, she was wearing a short skirt and it rode up exposing her panties to me, i was overcome with lust, i couldn't help myself, i went over, pulled down her panties and shafted her hard, right there and then" "thats it?" the priest asks, "yes father thats what happend, am i going to hell?" says the guy, "my son, this was your wife you say?" "yes father" "my son it is perfectly natural for a man to express his love for his wife in a physical way in the eyes of the church, you're not going to go to hell, if it makes you feel any better go home and say 10 hail marys" "really father, thats fantastic news, i was so worried, i thought i was going to be banned from the church" "not at all my son" says the priest " the church would never ban a man for making love to his wife" "well could you have word to the people at the supermarket for me then father" |
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| [jimmyjames] Monday, September 15, 2008 7:47:17 AM | |
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A guy goes into a confessional and says "forgive me father for i have sinned" "confess your sins and all will be forgiven my son" the priest replies. "well father " says the guy "yesterday my wife was bending over to get something out of the freezer, she was wearing a short skirt and it rode up exposing her panties to me, i was overcome with lust, i couldn't help myself, i went over, pulled down her panties and shafted her hard, right there and then" "thats it?" the priest asks, "yes father thats what happend, am i going to hell?" says the guy, "my son, this was your wife you say?" "yes father" "my son it is perfectly natural for a man to express his love for his wife in a physical way in the eyes of the church, you're not going to go to hell, if it makes you feel any better go home and say 10 hail marys" "really father, thats fantastic news, i was so worried, i thought i was going to be banned from the church" "not at all my son" says the priest " the church would never ban a man for making love to his wife" "well could you have word to the people at the supermarket for me then father" |
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| [crypticangle] Monday, September 15, 2008 5:14:34 AM | |
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THE SAPLING
TWO TALL TREES. A BIRCH & A BEECH ARE GROWING IN THE WOODS. A SMALL TREE BEGINS TO GROW IN BETWEEN THEM & THE BEECH SAYS TO THE BIRCH "IS THAT THE SON OF A BEECH OR THE SON OF A BIRCH ?"
THE BIRCH TREE SAYS HE CAN'T TELL.
JUST THEN A WOODPECKER LANDS ON THE SAPLING.
THE BIRCH TREE SAYS " WOODPECKER, YOU ARE A TREE EXPERT. CAN YOU TELL IF THAT IS THE SON OF A BEECH OR THE SON OF A BIRCH ?"
THE WOODPECKER TAKES A TASTE OF THE SMALL TREE.
HE REPLIES " IT IS NEITHER A SON OF A BEECH OR THE SON OF A BIRCH. IT IS HOWEVER THE BEST PEICE OF ASH I'VE EVER PUT MY PECKER IN !! " |
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| [Phantom A6] Sunday, September 14, 2008 5:37:38 AM | |
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| [lalouve] Sunday, September 14, 2008 5:31:38 AM | |
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What's the difference between a 69 and a winding mountain road in a blizzard ?
------ with the 69 you can at least see the asshole coming up ahead |
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| [jimmyjames] Sunday, September 14, 2008 3:49:44 AM | |
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Whats the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?
Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, Michael Jackson fucks kids. |
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| [crypticangle] Tuesday, September 02, 2008 5:54:15 AM | |
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LOL
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by swordsman5 from Tuesday, September 02, 2008 5:42:18 AM)| | | swordsman5 wrote: | | Old man goes to the doctor who askes him what is his problem. "Well every morning at 8.15 I have a massive dump." replies the old man.
"That's not a problem" replies the doctor, "In fact it's a very good sign that your bowels and digestive system are in good working order."
"Oh yes it is a problem" replies the old man, " I don't get up until 9 o'clock!" |
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| [swordsman5] Tuesday, September 02, 2008 5:42:18 AM | |
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Old man goes to the doctor who askes him what is his problem. "Well every morning at 8.15 I have a massive dump." replies the old man.
"That's not a problem" replies the doctor, "In fact it's a very good sign that your bowels and digestive system are in good working order."
"Oh yes it is a problem" replies the old man, " I don't get up until 9 o'clock!" |
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| [crypticangle] Monday, September 01, 2008 3:03:11 PM | |
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WHAT DID ONE SAGGY BOOB SAY TO THE OTHER ?
IF WE DON'T GET SUPPORT SOON, PEOPLE ARE GONNA THINK WE'RE NUTS |
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| [crypticangle] Monday, September 01, 2008 2:52:18 PM | |
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THE OLD MAN & THE SPERM COUNT
A LITTLE OLD MAN WENT TO THE DOCTOR TO FIND OUT HIS SPERM COUNT.
THE DOC GAVE HIM A SPECIMEN JAR & TOLD HIM TO TAKE IT HOME. FILL IT UP & BRING IT BACK THE NEXT DAY
THE LITTLE OLD MAN BROUGHT THE JAR BACK THE NEXT DAY AS CLEAN & EMPTY AS THE DAY BEFORE.
THE DOC ASKED "THERE'S NOTHING IN THERE--WHAT HAPPENED ?"
THE LITTLE OLD MAN SAID "WELL IT'S LIKE THIS-I TRIED IT WITH MY RIGHT HAND --NOTHING --THEN I TRIED IT WITH MY LEFT HAND --NOTHING--I ASKED MY WIFE TO HELP--SHE EVEN TRIED WITH HER MOUTH -TEETH IN & TEETH OUT--NOTHING--SO I ASKED MY NEIGHBOR TO HELP--SHE TRIED IT WITH HER HANDS , ARMPITS & EVEN SQUEEZED IT WITH HER KNEES --NOTHING"
THE DOCTOR SAID " YOU ASKED YOUR NEIGHBOR ?'
THE LITLLE OLD MAN SAID " YES--& NONE OF US COULD GET THE DANG JAR OPENED." |
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| [guidogodoy] Monday, September 01, 2008 2:41:23 PM | |
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I am going to have to share that one around the water cooler!
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by swordsman5 from Monday, September 01, 2008 1:41:29 PM)| | | swordsman5 wrote: | | A very tired nurse walks into a bank, Totally exhausted after an 18-hour shift.
Preparing to write a check, She pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse And tries to write with it.
When she realizes her mistake, She looks at the flabbergasted teller, And without missing a beat, she says:
'Well, that's great....that's just great....
Some asshole's got my pen!' |
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| [Soylentgreen4u] Monday, September 01, 2008 2:01:59 PM | |
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THAT'S CUTE...
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by loripip from Monday, September 01, 2008 1:49:48 PM)| | | loripip wrote: | | THE LITTLE OLD MAN
A LITTLE OLD MAN WENT TO THE DOCTOR FOR HIS CHECKUP
THE DOCTOR ASKED "HOW IS EVERYTHING GOING --BOWELS WORKING-- ARE YOU EATING RIGHT --HOW'S YOUR PEEING ? "
THE LITTLE OLD MAN SAID "EVERYTHING'S FINE AS A MATTER-OF-FACT WHEN I GO TO PEE AT NIGHT THE TOILET LIGHT COMES ON WHEN I START PEEING & GOES OFF WHEN I'M DONE."
THE DOCTOR IS CONFUSED BY THIS & ASKS THE WIFE WHAT THE LITTLE OLD MAN MEANT
THE WIFE REPLIES "OH THAT OLD FOOL HAS BEEN PEEING IN THE FRIDGE !! "
Edited at: Monday, September 01, 2008 1:56:03 PM |
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| [Vaillant 3.0] Monday, September 01, 2008 1:53:22 PM | |
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AWWW, MAN!!! THATS HILARIOUS!!!!!!!
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by loripip from Monday, September 01, 2008 1:49:48 PM)| | | loripip wrote: | | THE LITTLE OLD MAN
A LITTLE OLD MAN WENT TO THE DOCTOR FOR HIS CHECKUP
THE DOCTOR ASKED "HOW IS EVERYTHING GOING --BOWELS WORKING-- ARE YOU EATING RIGHT --HOW'S YOU PEEING ? "
THE LITTLE OLD MAN SAID "EVERYTHING'S FINE AS A MATTER-OF-FACT WHEN I GO TO PEE AT NIGHT THE TOILET LIGHT COMES ON WHEN I START PEEING & GOES OFF WHEN I'M DONE."
THE DOCTOR IS CONFUSED BY THIS & ASKS THE WIFE WHAT THE LITTLE OLD MAN MEANT
THE WIFE REPLIES "OH THAT OLD FOOL HAS BEEN PEEING IN THE FRIDGE !! " |
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| [crypticangle] Monday, September 01, 2008 1:49:48 PM | |
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THE LITTLE OLD MAN
A LITTLE OLD MAN WENT TO THE DOCTOR FOR HIS CHECKUP
THE DOCTOR ASKED "HOW IS EVERYTHING GOING --BOWELS WORKING-- ARE YOU EATING RIGHT --HOW'S YOUR PEEING ? "
THE LITTLE OLD MAN SAID "EVERYTHING'S FINE AS A MATTER-OF-FACT WHEN I GO TO PEE AT NIGHT THE TOILET LIGHT COMES ON WHEN I START PEEING & GOES OFF WHEN I'M DONE."
THE DOCTOR IS CONFUSED BY THIS & ASKS THE WIFE WHAT THE LITTLE OLD MAN MEANT
THE WIFE REPLIES "OH THAT OLD FOOL HAS BEEN PEEING IN THE FRIDGE !! "
Edited at: Monday, September 01, 2008 1:56:03 PM |
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| [Soylentgreen4u] Monday, September 01, 2008 1:48:14 PM | |
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| [crypticangle] Monday, September 01, 2008 1:45:17 PM | |
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LMAO !!!!
[Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by swordsman5 from Monday, September 01, 2008 1:41:29 PM)| | | swordsman5 wrote: | | A very tired nurse walks into a bank, Totally exhausted after an 18-hour shift.
Preparing to write a check, She pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse And tries to write with it.
When she realizes her mistake, She looks at the flabbergasted teller, And without missing a beat, she says:
'Well, that's great....that's just great....
Some asshole's got my pen!' |
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....THAT'S GOTTA HURT...